There are certain moments in a child’s life that are just simply unforgettable and moments that will define them. As parents we watch our kids make mistakes and learn from them but we also make mistakes and have to learn from them. There is no such thing as perfect parenting and there is not one child that grows up “perfect”. But in the end our lives somehow turn perfectly and the way they are supposed to.
On Saturday I am going to watch my daughter achieve a goal and we are going to celebrate my son’s birthday. Kaylee and Benja have such a special bond with each other so it is only fitting that a share a day of accomplishments, the gift of life and the pursuit of perfection. Six and a half years ago Kaylee was just 16 when she lost her Mom tragically in a car 
accident. That day sometimes seems like forever ago but some days it still feels like it just happened. All of these years later and we still feel her presence. After loosing her Mom Kaylee sought peace and comfort through Benja. At 5 months old he had no idea what was going on he just knew this beautiful girl loved to hold him, play with him and he became the center of her world.
Tonight while cooking dinner and listening to a holiday station on Pandora the reality of my kiddos growing up set in. Music has always spoken to me. And dang that Kelly Clarkson she got me. I found myself stirring my pasta sauce, crying and smiling all at the same. I know I am an emotional train wreck. But as I was standing there I saw Kaylee as a little girl with her Momma. I saw all of the over the top Christmas pictures she had made over the years. My Aunt loved her girls so very much and I just could not believe she was missing all of this.
Then of course I started wondering if Donna were here would she be ok with the way we raised her girls? Did I make a choice somewhere down the line that would have upset her. After a few moments of just being a hot mess I came to the realization that I think she would just be so proud. I remember as a kid she always supported everything I ever did even if it was a bad choice. She just loved and encouraged me and I honestly do not remember anything negative from her ever. Like I said all parents make mistakes and we are not perfect. When you are raising children in a normal environment it is already hard enough. But when you add in the loss of a parent, raising babies and teenagers at the same time, running a business, dealing with sick kids, suffering a miscarriage, loosing your house to a fire there is just no such thing as a normal environment. The stress sometimes can become overwhelming to all parties involved. Rob and I have done our best. We have learned that when we are wrong its ok to apologize to our children, children have some of the best insight so listening to their views and opinions is so important. Kids dream big and they can inspire us all if we just take a moment to listen. But most of all their innocence, their ability to forgive and their resili
ence is just something that still amazes me every single day.
Kaylee could have very easily given up on life when she lost her Mom. She could have let that time in her life define her in a negative way. She is so strong that she picked herself up, made goals and now she achieving them. I have sat and cried with her over the years but we have certainly celebrated so many wonderful things too. Saturday, Kaylee, my daughter, is going to graduate from The University of Oklahoma. She will officially be a “grown up” and I am just so unbelievably proud of her. Life is not always fair and we are given one chance to live the best life we can so we must push ourselves every single day to make our dreams our reality.
I am grateful that Kaylee and Donna made Rob and I apart of her life since the day she arrived. I am also so grateful that Kaylee has allowed us to be the obnoxious, loud, crazy parents that we 
are. She has let us grow up right along with her. She has showed us the ropes of sorority life and always allowed us to jump right on in with whatever she had going on. And let’s not forget that time, although it was embarrassing for her I am sure, I got to meet Dede Westbrook on Mom’s weekend. (This may be one of my highlights of her college experience) It has been so much fun enjoying her college life with her. It has been so much fun. I am excited for her new adventures of becoming a business woman, a fiancee, a wife and mother. A little scared of the mother part because the word Grandma is a little daunting LOL. She has her whole life ahead of her and her future is just so bright. She is destined to d
o great things.
Following graduation we will be celebrating with a family and friends not only Kaylee’s Graduation but Benja’s 7th birthday. He is so excited to be sharing is his day with his big sister Kaylee…he has been talking about it for months. He is such a sweet, caring, loving and ornery little boy. He himself has cheated death twice and he truly is a miracle. He is quiet but don’t let fool you. We have recently come to realize that he is like a human encyclopedia. He some how retains information so well and he can tell you a little about everything. He has my memory…Rob has always said I am like an elephant because I never forget…Benja is th
e exact same way. But most favorite quality about him is his sensitivity. I hope that quality stays with him his entire life. Sometimes as you grow up life takes it toll and you don’t realize you are building walls and you don’t realize that you have become a little hardened. I get that but allowing yourself to feel and allowing yourself to be sensitive towards others and in certain situations is valuable. Benja just knows when his Momma needs a hug or an “I love you Momma.” I have enjoyed watching him grow up and I am excited to see where life takes him.
So on Saturday I will be a proud Mom, so full of love and a hot hot mess. Parents, take the time to get to know your kids. Encourage them in all aspects of their lives. Let them have a voice, let them dream, help them achieve goals, and please slow down and just take the time to enjoy them and celebrate them because they group up so fast. But most importantly just love them for who they are. It use to seem like graduations would be so far down the road but now I can actually picture all of my kids right were Kaylee is.
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